DISCLAIMER - I am not planning on fighting a pelican.

I need this on a T-shirt.

Seriously, this is the best thing I have seen on the Internet in a long time. It’s like I’m in 2013 all over again. Lol.

Because I live in America and there’s pretty much no public transportation.

Trust me, if I had a train, I’d fucking use that sucker. Travel into town for my weekly errands AND I don’t have to deal with people not using cruise control on a highway? SIGN ME THE FUCK. UP.