I was gonna ask about the loving Hezbollah patriots, too

A father walks in on his son masturbating and says “if you keep that up, you’re going to go blind.” The son responds “I’m over here, Dad.”

Open your eeeeeeyes, I see… Your eyes are open

It’s likely to soon fall off

they could overload the input neurons with a ton of stimulus

“Do you smell smoke??”

“Yes, I just got a text message. Phone calls taste like bananas”

@Shatur@lemmy.ml please don’t fix your typo. This is way better

Just like how I bought a toilet for Ian Peter Freely

I TOLD YOU NOT TO BUILD IT, DAMNIT!

Super-do real-magic --for-real /* (<- that’s a magic wand)